From Bango-Bongo-Bingo to Led Zeppelin

It’s interesting to me the ways in which Computer Science exams attempt to deceive students. The trick that sometimes gets me is the unnecessary-answer-inversion modification: start out with a mostly straightforward question and make the correct answer the opposite of what would be expected.

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The example above contains a second artificial layer of difficulty through the use of nonsense words in an inheritance hierarchy. After reading the code, any reasonable person would question the name Bango and how it relates to a Bingo and Bongo. It’s at this point that one must accept the game that’s being played between the educator and the learner. Sadly, induced cognitive stutterings are one particular result of the malformed educational transaction that is occurring.

Another trick that works on me 100% of the time is the unnecessary-details-about-awesome-rock-and-roll-band modification:

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In this case, I started thinking about how I would much rather be playing bongos along to Houses of the Holy icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12 than taking this stupid test.

Last Call for the Rascals

Mr. Clean icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12 (track 03 from the Katorz LP by Voivod icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12 )

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I just witnessed another club eviction
I wonder what he did to get this lesson
Just like that crazy singer, what’s his name?

Who will be the next one to get thrown out?
Just like a garbage bag, go join your friends
It is time to conform with conformity

Plastic holds
Robot souls

“Last call for the rascals”
Mr. Clean says, “Last call for the rascals”

The good old days expired, new kind of people
Prototype generation, all inspected

Shiny chromes
Spirits sold

“Last call for the rascals”
Mr. Clean says, “Last call for the rascals”

Mr. Clean kills germs
Removal!

The homeless out
The poor out
The punks out
The colored out
The striped out
The stains out
The troubled out
The wilds out
The wrongs out
The problems out
The bugs out
The bands out

Wipe them off

The leathers out
The queens out
The freaks out
The misfits out
The loud out
The fly out
The ugly out
The olds out
The smalls out
The bums out
The bad out
And me out

And you, all pure

Nice and clean society
Long live democracy

Because Star Wars Isn’t Big Enough Already

Quentin Tarantino on Disney vs. ‘The Hateful Eight’ icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12 (from Howard Stern icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12 )

Candy is Bad for You

It’s Christmas time and people are consuming even more candy than usual. I contributed to the problem today by spending way too much money on candies for some of the sugarmongers in my life: chocolate-covered espresso beans, chocolate-covered almonds, chocolate-covered macadamia nuts, chocolate-covered chocolate… chocolate-covered everything!

But let’s be straight: candy is bad for you, and this perhaps becomes more obvious to people when it comes served in a toilet bowl.

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It would be nice if I could give these as gifts instead of the chocolates, but this really wouldn’t go over well with most. Eating lots of Christmas-themed candy and chocolates is just a part of the holiday season, and one surefire way to put a damper on any yuletide celebration is to hand somebody a sucker shaped like a plunger.

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It’s worth pointing out that these candy-toilets have two holsters on each side, which is an interesting touch. It’s always good to have a spare, I suppose. What will they think of next? Candy cane plungers and chocolate… oh nevermind.