When Progress Becomes Two Steps Forward, Two Steps Back

Today is Martin Luther King Jr. Day, a holiday celebrated in the United States on whatever Monday exists between the dates of January 15th and 21st. This year’s holiday is special because Mr. King was actually born on this day in 1929: he would be 89 years old today, which is the same age at which B.B. King icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12 died in 2015. In other words, B.B. King died less than three years ago and is older than M.L.K.—the dude could still be alive if he hadn’t been assassinated.

Martin Luther King Jr. Day always falls on a Monday because the federal government has it classified as a paid-time-off holiday. This means that if you don’t have a shitty job then you get a three day weekend shortly after Christmas break without having to burn any vacation time (sweet!). If you’re one of the poor individuals who actually have to work on this day, and there are still many, then that basically means that your employer still believes in slavery. This is a loose interpretation, of course, but it is not inaccurate.

It’s very peculiar how some national holidays are celebrated in America, particularly this one. For me, Martin Luther King Jr. Day is an opportunity for everyone to take 24 hours to reflect on how totally fucked up this country was for so long, and also recognize how fucked up it still is. Sadly, many fair-minded white people regard slavery as something that existed about a million years ago, and have a general sentiment along the lines of “it sure is great that we got past that.” Meanwhile, when these same people get an extra day off, most do whatever it is that the average white person does in his or her leisure: go camping, barbecue, watch Friends reruns, etc.

Martin Luther King Jr. Day is essentially Black Persons’ Day (again, another loose interpretation, but not inaccurate). As such, it would be more appropriate if black people took the day off and white people had to cover their shifts, at least until the gravity of the day set in a bit more with the general populace. Unfortunately, as supposedly great as America is, it’s not mature enough to institute something like this without some serious shit going down. As a perfect example, simply look at all the dialogue that has been generated recently due to the increased focus on hate groups in America.

It’s safe to say that a larger percentage of the black population had to work today than the white population, which is quite unacceptable.

Veteran’s Day is another national holiday that is totally messed up. For non-veterans, it’s just another day off… another day to have fun, and postpone or dodge responsibilities, or whatever. The idea of a veteran having to work on Veteran’s Day is rather profound, and this has happened countless times to countless veterans over the decades. (What’s even more profound is a black veteran having to work on both Martin Luther King Jr. Day and Veteran’s Day!) Some states have fixed this: they require that employers allow veterans to take a paid day off. Also, apparently an employer can choose to give a veteran the day off and pay them, but not extend that same courtesy to other non-veteran employees. Still, this is woefully inadequate. Veterans should have Veteran’s Day off. 1 + 1 = 2… this is not a complicated idea.

As for me, what did I do on Mr. King’s 89th birthday? I slept in till 10:00am, watched some cartoons, went to the gym, made a really awesome mushroom omelet, and wrote this fucking blog post, bitches.

Mythical Creature

This is my dream woman: hygienic, feminine, no tattoos (or at least no bad tattoos), wears heavy metal t-shirts.

Hot girl wearing a Slayer t-shirt.

The only thing that’s really missing from this picture is her holding a Stephen King book in one hand and an IPA icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12 in the other. Flipping the bird would work too.

I’ve been wondering for a while now whether women like this even exist. I know they should, but I don’t think they actually do.

Anyway, if anybody reading this happens to know this girl’s phone number, please send it to me IMMEDIATELY.

Trickling Down

Dear California,

South Jefferson would like its water back. Please consider investing a significant portion of the extra money you will be making through increased car registration costs and recreational marijuana sales in safe and scalable desalinization technologies and infrastructure.

Sincerely,
Chad

P.S. Taxes suck.

Repetitive Redundancies

On Facebook, it is possible to have a dedicated page for a baseball team. It is also possible to have a private group for the players of said team. These exist as two separate entities until the dedicated page is made to be an administrator of the private group—at this point they become linked together.

Confusing? Yes. Apparently it is confusing to Facebook as well. When the page and the group share the same name, goofy things like this start to happen:

"Redding Ringtails Baseball Club made Redding Ringtails Baseball Club an admin of the group Redding Ringtails Baseball Club," brought to you by Redding Ringtails Baseball Club.

To translate, this is Facebook sending out an announcement to all members of the group Redding Ringtails Baseball Club that Redding Ringtails Baseball Club the group made Redding Ringtails Baseball Club the site an administrator of Redding Ringtails Baseball Club the group.

If one our players hadn’t “liked” the posting then I never would have noticed that Facebook was capable of such silliness. (Having a keen sense of humor is an unspoken requirement in becoming an official member of this team.)