The Magnificent Seven 
(2016 American film directed by Antoine Fuqua )
This movie looks terrible—the word “gosh” didn’t even exist in the Wild Wild West.
Denzel Washington is such a ******.
Gosh Dang-it, I’m Good!
Reply
Tag Archives: Musings
A Kingly Ending
The Stand , written by Stephen King and released in 1978, is more than 800 pages long. The Stand: The Complete & Uncut Edition was released in 1990 and is more than 1100 pages long. The book is definitely worth reading. It also has what I consider to be a happy ending: an atom bomb is detonated in Las Vegas.
This is not to suggest that I would like to see Las Vegas be exploded; but I do think that if a nuclear weapon were to go off in the US, Las Vegas would be one of the the better places for it to happen.
Dialectic Trailmix
I loathe bumper stickers and typically regard people who put them on their vehicles as inconsiderate. To my reckoning, an individual’s personality deficiencies are directly relatable to the number of stickers affixed to her car. Yesterday, however, I was stuck behind somebody with only one sticker, and this sticker actually brought me some amusement. It read: God wants spiritual fruit, not religious nuts.
I was immediately reminded of the only other bumper sticker that has brought me any amount of joy. It was in the same vein as the one above, but highly provocative… maybe even incitant. I have never actually seen it on anybody’s car—I only came across it in a music store that was known to carry some morally ambiguous wares (this store has since gone out of business). I think that if a person actually put this sticker on his car then his insurance policy would be cancelled due to imminent vandalism. Its words were as thought-provoking as they were offensive.
With all the bad parts edited out, the bumper sticker reads: *** * ***** ***** *** *****.
Creative Writing for Assholes 101
From: INSPECTOR.GRANT WATSON <4w3@lalllaaa.ee.tn>
Subject: YOUR CONSIGNMENT BOXES DELIVERY.
Reply to: inspectorgrant945@gmail.com
To: Recipients <4w3@lalllaaa.ee.tn>
INSPECTOR GRANT WATSON
UNITED NATION INSPECTION AGENCY
HART FIELD-JACKSON INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT
ATLANTA GEOGIA,
I am GRANT WATSON Inspection Agency in Harts field-Jackson International Airport Atlanta, Georgia. During our investigation, I discovered an abandoned shipment through a Diplomat from FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA which was transferred from Murtala International Airport. To our facility here in Atlanta, and when scanned it revealed an undisclosed sum of money in 2 Metal Trunk Boxes. The consignment was abandoned because the Content was not properly declared by the consignee as money rather it was declared as personal Effect/classified document to either avoid diversion by the Shipping Agent or confiscation by the relevant authorities.
The diplomat's inability to pay for Non Inspection fees among other things are the reason why the consignment is delayed and abandoned. By my assessment, each of the boxes contains about $4M or more. They are still left in the airport storage facility till today. The Consignments like I said are two metal trunk boxes, the details of the consignment including your name and email on the official document from United Nations' office in NIGERIA where the shipment was tagged as personal effects/classified document is still available with us. As it stands now, you have to reconfirm your Full name, Phone Number, full address so I can cross-check and see if it corresponds with the one on the official documents.
It is now left to you to decide if you are the beneficiary and still need the consignment or allow us repatriate it back to NIGERIA (place of origin) as we were instructed. Like I did say again, the shipper abandoned it and ran away most importantly because he gave a false declaration, he could not pay for the yellow tag, he could not secure a valid non inspection document(s), etc. I am ready to assist you in any way I can for you to get back this packages if only you are willing to work with me with trust. You can either come in person, or you engage the services of a secure shipping/delivery Company/agent that will provide the necessary security. That is required to deliver the package to your doorstep or the destination of your choice. I need the entire guarantee that I can get from you before I can get involved in this project.
Best Regards,
MR GRANT WATSON
INSPECTION OFFICER.
Email :{inspectorgrant945@gmail.com}
The sad thing is that spam mail like this wouldn’t exist if there weren’t people out there that believed everything they read. The MR. GRANT WATSON INSPECTION OFFICER shtick convinces enough dummies to respond with their personal information, and this is why it is worth somebody’s time to write such duplicitous drivel. Meanwhile, the rest of the world suffers.
It kinda makes you wonder how 999 out of every 1000 emails are about Viagra and penis enlargement, and yet it’s not difficult to infer why this happens: lots of men—and zero women, I should add—actually respond to these messages and divulge their personal details and credit card numbers. If this wasn’t the case then a significant number of crooked schemers on the Internet wouldn’t have anything to show for their efforts. Instead of sending spam mail, they would try to discover a new way to trick people out of their money, or order a Little Caesar’s pizza for breakfast, or watch a Pawn Stars marathon… or maybe apply for a job at ICANN?