Proof that Google is Not Always Correct

The other night, I was grooving to the song High Voltage icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12 by AC/DC. It’s a killer track from the band’s classic era and has some very simple but wickedly clever (and catchy) vocal harmonies in the chorus. For the uninitiated, the band’s original singer, Bon Scott icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12, was a truly amazing performer. His voice lives in the higher registers and, like many aspects of AC/DC’s early music, what he sings is deceptively complex.

I have always had good vocal control, but hitting higher notes, particularly in Bon Scott’s range, has generally been difficult for me. Over the last couple of years, I have worked a lot on my singing and have gained a lot of ground. So… inspired in the moment and feeling confident, I opened Google Chrome on my smartphone to pull up the lyrics to the song so I could follow along and lead appropriately in to those really high “high voltage!” lines in the chorus that are so difficult but satisfying to hit.

I typed in “High Voltage lyrics” and was a little pissed to find that a different song with the same name came up from the band Linkin Park:

Google search for "High Voltage lyrics" produces Linkin Park as top result (over AC/DC). [Thumbnail]

This is not even one of Linkin Park’s more popular songs, nor was it a single, yet it’s favored in search results over AC/DC’s High Voltage!?? I understand times change, and fads come and go like the turning of the tide, but something ain’t quite right here.

What might Google’s algorithms be doing? It should be easy to make the argument that AC/DC’s song is more culturally significant than Linkin Park’s song: one was a hit single and the other was not. AC/DC is also a bigger band than Linkin Park with the former selling many tens of millions of albums more than the latter. Linkin Park has certainly been more active and relevant in the last two decades, so perhaps that’s why it is receiving preference.

Well, whatever… the point is Linkin Park sucks a fatty compared to 70s-era AC/DC, make no bones about it. If Linkin Park was somehow supposed to usurp the claim to the “High Voltage” song title then the band failed miserably, despite Google favoring it. By the same token, if any other band is ever going to try to build a stronger association between that song title and their band name then they really have their fucking work cut out for them.

It’s also worth noting that Google isn’t meritocratic in its search results—give people what they want and not what they need (yes, you really do need Bon Scott’s AC/DC). Meanwhile, bury the splendidness of the past if it’s less likely to make a buck in the present.

No One Has to Tell Her What a Feller is For

She’s Got Balls icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12 (track 08 from the High Voltage LP by AC/DC icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12 )

AC/DC's "High Voltage" album cover. [Formatted]

She’s got style, that woman
Makes me smile, that woman
She’s got spunk, that woman
And funk, that woman
She’s got speed, my baby
Got what I need, my baby
She’s got the ability to make a man outta me

But most important of all—let me tell you—my lady’s got balls
She’s got balls

She’s got soul, my lady
Likes to crawl, my lady
All around the floor on her hands and knees because she likes to please me

But most important of all—let me tell you—my lady’s got balls
She’s got balls

And she’s got taste, my lady
And pace, my lady
Makes my heart race with her pretty face

She’s got balls, my lady
Likes to crawl, my lady
On hands and knees, all around the floor
No one has to tell her what a fella is for

But let me tell you, my lady’s got balls
She’s got balls

Riot Volume

Rock ‘n roll and heavy metal concerts are terrible. They have always been terrible and they’re getting worse. They’re so loud you can’t hear anything except a prescribed hours-long barrage of semi-dizzying percussive blasts, which are caused nearly as much by the guitars, bass, and vocals as by the drum set. If a person doesn’t wear ear plugs, his ears are ringing for the next two or three days—perhaps longer. If he does wear ear plugs, everything comes across sounding muffled and unarticulated.


How the hell did it become acceptable practice to wear ear plugs to music performances anyway? Isn’t that the same as strapping on leg braces before going skiing, or ordering non-alcoholic beer at a brewpub? Don’t people go to concerts to experience the music? If the vast majority of people cannot properly experience the music, with or without earplugs, how could they possibly be enjoying themselves?


There are also a lot of sweaty, stinky SOBs at these concerts too… and the tickets can be absurdly overpriced. Here’s a prime example: it costs between $145 and $366 to see a geriatric version of AC/DC icon-external-link-12x12 icon-search-12x12. This is a band that hasn’t released a good rock ‘n roll album since around the time John Lennon was assassinated, yet people are willing to blow a car payment and risk a case of tinnitus for one more chance to “hear” classic songs from a bygone era resurrected in a live setting. Crikey!